Hoo Stories: A UVa Student Blog

The 25 Stages of Your Mellow Mushroom Addiction

The corner is a staple of life at UVA for everyone from first years to fourth years and is filled with wondrous restaurants and places to hang out. From Starbucks to Bodo’s to Two Guys Tacos, the options are endless. However, at the end of the corner there is a magical place known as Mellow Mushroom. Inevitably, you will figure out that Mellow Mushroom is literally your life’s blood and from my experience this is how that realization will pan out.

1. First you hear talk about this amazing pizza place down on the corner.

2. You think, hey, I like pizza. Maybe I should try this place out sometime and everyone else seems to love it.

3. When told the name of this fabled locale you experience some doubt. Mellow Mushroom? Uh, okay that’s an interesting name for a restaurant. 

4. Your love of pizza compels you to overcome the slight hesitation and so you grab some friends and head on over.

5.You walk in and are confronted with the, uh, interesting décor.

6. Okay, well you made it all this way and it smells pretty good in here so why not ignore vaguely trippy ‘70s wall paintings.

7. You order a pizza or a calzone.

8. You see all this food going by you as you’re waiting for your order to come out.

9. Oh wow. That looks really good. So does that. And that.

10. You are breathless with anticipation waiting for it to come out and start getting very excited.

11. You think it’s been a million hours since you placed your order.

12.  It has not actually been that long but at this point you’re really hungry, okay?

13. Hallelujah! You see it! That is definitely your food!

14. It is!

15. Holy mackerel this stuff looks good and your waitress is surely a goddess for bringing it to you.

16. You dig in and oh. My. Goodness.

17. You have not tasted anything like this unbelievable compilation of dough, sauce, and cheese before

18. Where has this been your whole life??????

19. You obviously have not been living before having this pizza.

20.  And the dough is made with all these fresh ingredients and made by hand.

21. This pizza is totally healthy then.

22. Yeah. Let’s go with that. Healthy.

23. So you can totally eat as much pizza as humanly possible.

24. You do. No regrets.

25. You finish the pizza and immediately start planning your next trip here because THIS IS THE BEST PIZZA EVER AND YOU WILL NOT LIVE WITHOUT HAVING THIS AT LEAST ONCE A WEEK.